For other people it takes a lot to bring their walls down..
Even in constant attacks and battles.. during defeat they rebuild and after defeat they mourn, strategize and reform.
But for some it takes just once..
One monsterous hit and they forever cannot build again..
All the energy and the will is aborted by the failed effort.
The only thing created is a pessimistic mind frame..
Where I can't take that solo again.
or birth a child or get a lover again
or take that risk cause theyve been lied to,
cheated and stolen from, miscarried
or been broken before.
It's life like a bad dream inescapeable.
Like a fate, irrefutable
Best understand that contrary to public eye they do not crown their defeat but are swallowed by the scar of the first attempt and forever have been damnified with the ultimate and incontestable resolution that ..
When I try, When I want to ,When it is time, When I need to.. I will fail..
My will is not lost it's right in front of me but it's lost it's breathe
For me it's different.
I'm different or I'd like to think I am
Because I actually am.
For me it's not the action that needs to be redone
It's me. I need to be transformed.
You see,
It was not the past that defined my present
It was my present who accused my past so long that I lost sight of it's mischievous and nefarious self growth.
I am bare,nude just as the good Lord made me
I even took off my veneration.
The concentration.
And I closed my eyes as I bathe myself.
I am ashamed of the fifth that flows away.
I took in a drop
A drop of sin.. it's only a drop boy pick youself up, he encouraged, Do you not know that rain drops produce floods Lucifer? Stay behind me..
I am not lost, I am palpable, but I've lost my breath