Dear Plumeria

I want to say it but then I can't
I'm afraid of uncertainties
It may be or maybe not
I try to hold on to this strong sensation

Hoping that someday it'll find me
Given that now is not good timing
But my biggest problem is this
What if you forget me just as time rolls by

I think I'm certain now
And the next minute I'm not
Well I try not to make decisions even when certain
I fear I might create a loop hole 

My mind works like it's intoxicated
Logs onto you all round the 24 hour clock
I spend time pondering over you
Or rather blocking random thoughts of you

I don't want to make a mistake
But then I don't want to let this go
I never admit but I might just give in
I don't know what I want

Do I?

I need a little help